The Ballad of Sophie and Clem
by elizard100
Summary: Buffy's Birthday Episode from a different perspective


The Ballad of Sophie and Clem  
  
These characters are the creation of Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy and don't belong to me at all. I just borrowed them for a little while.  
  
If you want to share, please do so, just let me know. My email address is elizard100@yahoo.ca  
  
This Fanfic contains spoilers for "Older and Far Away" However it is from a different perspective than was in the actual television episode.  
  
  
  
Clem sat staring at the television set, contemplating another Saturday night home alone. He was fresh out of kittens so he couldn't even while away the evening with a game of poker down at the local demon haunts.  
  
A knock at the door startled him and a couple of $5 dollar bills fell out of the skin flaps on his arms. "Hey," Clem thought, his mood picking up. "I was wondering what happened to those."  
  
Answering the door he found himself face to face with Spike, his sometime poker partner, looking a little worse for wear and sporting a black eye. "Wow," Clem stared surprised, since Spike always made himself out to be a fighting champ. "What does the other guy look like?"  
  
Spike shuffled a little uncomfortably. "Well, um, I got into a disagreement with a friend a couple of nights ago, but I'll be right as rain in a day or two. Actually can I talk to you about something," Spike asked.  
  
"Sure," said Clem, motioning for Spike to take a seat.  
  
Spike didn't move. "Uh, vampire, you have to invite me in," he pointed out.  
  
Clem smiled, embarrassed, "Oh, I'm sorry, come in." Clem cleared away newspapers and other debris from the chair. "That's right, you've never been over before. Sorry about the mess. I don't get company very often. Well actually I suppose you're the first person I've ever had over."  
  
Spike looked around at the modestly furnished apartment. Not quite a hole in the ground but not much better either. "How long have you lived here?" he asked, making conversation.  
  
"About two years," Clem admitted. "I keep meaning to fix the place up a bit and have a little house warming party but I don't have very many friends and I don't think you can do that after you've lived somewhere this long."  
  
"Um, yeah, I think you're right," agreed Spike, obviously looking to change the subject. "Anyway, there's this girl, the Slayer. It's her birthday today and one of her mates mentioned they're having a shindig for her tonight. Probably be a bit of a wankfest but things are a bit dull so I thought I might check it out. Thing is, I really don't fancy heading over there by myself. You wouldn't want to go with me would you?"  
  
"Wow, Spike," Clem marvelled. "You've never socialized with me outside of our poker games. In fact you aren't even very nice to me then."  
  
"So do you want to go to the party or not?" Spike was losing his patience.  
  
"Will there be any other demons there?" Clem's interest had been peaked. "Girl demons?"  
  
"Oh, yeah," Spike lied. "The place will be crawling with them. She's very open minded about the company she keeps. Look at what great pals she and I are. Considering we're supposed to be mortal, well immortal, enemies she doesn't have any problems socializing with me." Then under his breath Spike added, "among other things."  
  
Clem grinned widely causing his ear flaps to stand up at attention. "This is turning out to be a much better night than I imagined. First I find ten bucks then I get invited to a party. I can't imagine what will happen next."  
  
Spike eyed the ten dollars Clem displayed happily then added in a false innocence, "Hmmm. We should make a stop at the beer store on our way."  
  
* * *  
  
The clock had just chimed 8pm and Sophie looked out the window nervously as she punched out her time card at the Doublemeat Palace. Her stomach was all in knots. Tonight was the night of Buffy's birthday party. Sophie didn't really want to go. Being around strangers made her nervous but her mother had insisted. Although she was twenty years old Sophie was still too intimidated by her mother to refuse anything she asked. Tonight would be worse than anything. There would be people she didn't know there and she was going to have to talk to them. She wished she could just stay home and watch television with her little Sharpei Petey. Petey was the dearest thing in the world to her. He loved her absolutely and without reserve and she loved him back. It would be infinitely preferable to spend the evening with just him but there was no escaping the inevitable.  
  
As she walked the short distance to Buffy's house Sophie went over in her head all the possible ways she could get out of this. She could fake being sick, an allergy attack might work but her mother was all too familiar with that ploy and she wouldn't likely fall for that one again. Maybe she'd save that for the party. That way if she really wanted to leave she could just say she was having an allergic reaction. Sophie felt a little bit better at the thought of the escape clause.  
  
"Now Sophie," her mother had droned she left that morning. "Do try to talk to people for a change but don't talk too much. People don't like that and remember to smile. You don't smile enough and you really should after what your father and I spent on your braces. Make sure you don't drink any beer. The barley in it will make you fat and nobody will like you if you balloon up. And don't forget to tell Buffy thank you for inviting you to the party. You'll never have any friends if you aren't polite to people so make sure you say thank you as soon as you get there or else you'll forget. Are you even listening to me?"  
  
"Yes mother," Sophie had agreed, sighing. Actually seeing Buffy was the one thing Sophie was looking forward to about tonight. Buffy was different from everyone else at Doublemeat Palace. She hadn't lost her spirit yet. Before Buffy came along there were some days when Sophie couldn't tell if she had just started her shift or was just about to go home. Time had no meaning. Working with Buffy made that different. She actually had fun at work now sometimes. Maybe tonight wouldn't be so bad after all.  
  
* * *  
  
Spike raised his hand to knock on the door then paused and turned to Clem. "I should tell you something before we go in," Spike admitted. "About all these demons that I said were going to be here."  
  
Clem looked at him a little nervous, "What do you mean Spike? There will be other demons here tonight? I didn't want to come if there wasn't."  
  
"Well, it's like this. Some of them are going to look like demons and some aren't. They're in disguise so they'll look like people. Just so you know ahead of time, you won't necessarily be able to tell which ones are demons. Often times I can't even tell and I spend a fair amount of time with them," Spike lied fairly convincingly.  
  
Clem thought about it for a second then shrugged his shoulders, "I guess that's ok then."  
  
Spike smiled and finally knocked on the door. "Oh and let me carry that beer for you," he offered.  
  
Opening the door he found himself facing Buffy and Tara in the kitchen.  
  
"Spike," Buffy sounded surprised. "What are you doing here?"  
  
While Spike explained their presence Clem looked at Buffy in horrified recognition. This was that girl with the tight skin who had released all his kittens that one night. He couldn't believe that she was the Slayer. If Spike had said it was her birthday he wouldn't have come. This girl was trouble and Clem suspected she had a drinking problem. Briefly acknowledging Buffy Clem proceeded to introduce himself to Tara. He could swear she was flirting with him the way she kept looking him up and down. Then a few more tight skinned individuals entered the kitchen.  
  
"Yech," Clem thought. "How disgusting. That must be so incredibly uncomfortable to be like that, all tight and all."  
  
Luckily that Buffy girl left with the others. Clem was pleased to discover that Tara was attempting to start a conversation with him. Odd topic but anything she said he'd agree to just to make her keep talking to him. Strangely Spike was a little upset about something. He stormed off into the other room. Clem took advantage of being alone with Tara to talk to her a little bit more.  
  
"So, did you come to the party with your boyfriend?" Clem asked leadingly.  
  
Tara giggled a little and got an amused look on her face, "No, I most definitely did not. I, uh, don't have a boyfriend."  
  
"Alright," Clem thought smiling. "I'm in." But just then another woman entered the room. Tara looked at the red head and started stammering uncomfortably. Clem came to the conclusion that Tara was worried this other woman would be competition for his attentions and hey if she responded as well as this first one had, maybe she was. He was on a roll with these demon chicks in disguise. He wondered secretly what they really looked like. Following the direction where Spike had gone he left the two women to sort things out between themselves.  
  
"Spike," Clem caught the vampire off guard as he stood glaring out the front window. "You weren't kidding about the chicks here. It's fantastic. I've got to ask though, what kind of demons are they?"  
  
Spike turned to face him, a little annoyed. "What?" he demanded. At a loss he spotted Xander talking to Anya, "She's an ex-vengeance demon and that git in the red shirt who came into the kitchen, Richard he calls himself, is a, um, Benzax demon."  
  
Clem shuddered looking out the window, "The poor guy. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I gotta tell you though Spike, I don't like that Buffy. I didn't know it was her you meant or I wouldn't have come along."  
  
Spike turned around abruptly. "Why, what's wrong with her?" he demanded.  
  
Clem looked a little uncomfortable about being put on the spot. "Well, she's just weird. I get a strange vibe from her like something is off."  
  
Spike nodded in agreement. "You and me both mate."  
  
Just then Tara walked into the room.  
  
"Oh well, how bad can it be?" Clem added. "After all, this party can't last forever and I must admit some aspects of it could prove to be worth risking an evening at home with the Slayer."  
  
* * *  
  
A half hour later the whole group stood around in the livingroom watching Buffy open her gifts. Clem could barely stand to look at her. She had all that shiny blonde hair on her head and she was so little and skinny. There was almost nothing to her. He wasn't even going to start on how tight her skin was again since Spike had seemed completely oblivious to that one.  
  
Buffy opened the gift from Tara. It was a scented sachet with herbs inside. "You put it under your pillow. That's to help you have sweet dreams. It's filled with lavender, rosemary, oh and a hint of garlic," she added giggling with a sly smile aimed in Spike's direction.  
  
Spike had a very sour look on his face.  
  
Buffy's sister plopped down beside the birthday girl, "That will be nice and relaxing for you after you've been out pounding the big evil all night."  
  
The look on Spike's face turned into a smirk. "Oh yes, the *big* evil," he taunted. "So, um, how big an evil would you say it is on average? Incredibly large? Monstrously huge? I mean, how big an evil are we talking here Slayer? For instance is it the biggest evil you've ever seen in your life?"  
  
Buffy squirmed at this line of questioning but everyone's eyes were on her. "Biggish," she finally conceded.  
  
"Hey Spike," Dawn interrupted. "Did you bring a gift for Buffy?"  
  
"Yeah, I've got something for her but I'll have to give it to her back at my crypt." Spike was trying to act seriously. "Maybe later on, huh Buffy?"  
  
Buffy quickly looked down uncomfortably her eyes bulging out of her head. Not only was she flaky but boy she sure was funny looking Clem thought to himself.  
  
A knock at the door startled Clem out of his thoughts. As the door opened he was immediately drawn to the tantalising aroma of this person who came through the door. She smelled like…like….he couldn't place it but it was heavenly.  
  
Buffy introduced this new person as Sophie. Clem put on his biggest smile and greeted this wonderful smelling woman.  
  
* * *  
  
As Sophie stepped inside Buffy's house she suddenly became very aware of the fact that she smelled like the Doublemeat Palace. Hopefully noone would notice or if they did they would be too polite to mention it. This just added to her anxiety. In a panic attack Sophie immediately launched into her tirade about her allergies and even went so far as to repeat what her mother had said about saying thank you for the invitation.  
  
"Stupid, stupid, stupid," Sophie repeated to herself mentally. "Now they're going to think you're a complete loser."  
  
Sophie looked around the room at the sea of strange faces staring back at her in bewilderment. Even Buffy seemed trying to explain her oddness to the blonde woman beside her in a whispered aside. But then as Sophie turned to her right she found herself looking into the kindest eyes she had ever seen. A friendly smile greeted her without reservation. Sophie had always felt like such an outsider and here was someone who was obviously an outsider also. Buffy made the introductions and Sophie learned that this kind eyed stranger was named Clem. Something about him was so familiar and yet she knew she had never met him before. Nervously she offered Buffy her birthday gift, picked out by her mother of course, like everything in her life, from what she was studying in school to the clothes on her back. Sophie stole a glance at Clem over her shoulder as Buffy sat down to open her gift. Her mother would likely not approve of Clem.  
  
"Wow," Buffy announced in surprise. "This is great Sophie. Thank you so much." Buffy held up a long red silk scarf for the group's approval.  
  
"That could come in handy," the blond guy in the long jacket smirked. "I can think of a number of uses for *that* gift."  
  
Buffy quickly changed the subject and Sophie just smiled politely. She felt like she was missing a joke but noone else seemed to get it so she didn't worry about it too much.  
  
"Let's put some music on," Buffy's sister Dawn suggested.  
  
* * *  
  
Sophie stood to one side of the room while Clem looked on from a distance.  
  
"Spike, come here," he called out to the vamp. Spike seemed to be a pretty foul mood considering it was him who wanted to come to this party. Pulling Spike out into the hallway Clem tried to get some information out of him. "That girl, Sophie. What do you know about her? She's a demon isn't she?"  
  
"Oh sure," the vampire lied. "Don't rightly know what kind but you can tell by the eyes. Oh and um, Red over there is a witch, or I should say was one. The young 'un with the long brown hair is a mystical energy key of some sort. Lots of lovely people for you to talk to."  
  
Clem looked longingly over at Sophie as he peered around the corner shyly. "Maybe I'll ask her to dance."  
  
"Why don't you do that," Spike agreed helpfully. "I've got to have a word with someone."  
  
Clem noticed that Spike was wearing his nervous poker face, the one where he was extremely unhappy with his hand but couldn't do anything about it.  
  
"What a strange guy," Clem observed. "Boy, there sure are a lot of unusual party goers here tonight. Clem looked towards Sophie once again and thought to himself, "But sometimes unusual was a pretty good thing."  
  
Clem approached Sophie and as casually as he could started to ask her to dance when to his surprise she asked him.  
  
"This music is so great I really want to dance and noone else is into it. Let's go," she smiled warmly.  
  
Spike, looking intently for something as he passed through, bumped into Clem in mid-dance step.  
  
"Sorry mate," Spike apologized absentmindedly before turning into the front hallway.  
  
Dancing with Sophie was like heaven. She was so graceful and so rhythmic. What a natural. After a little while Tara looked around and then got up and started towards the hallway as well, narrowly missing bumping into the dancing couple. "Boy some people were really out of it tonight," Clem observed. "And it was still pretty early."  
  
* * *  
  
Clem looked down at his watch to discover that it was 11:00. "Wow," he thought. "I can't believe it's this late already."  
  
He went to the refrigerator to get another beer. He had been dancing with Sophie for such a long time that he had only had one beer all night but he had worked up a thirst and was looking forward to his well deserved refreshment.  
  
"What?" Clem cried out in amazement turning to Sophie. "My beer is all gone. Someone's drunken it all." Clem could see the empties sitting on the counter. "Well that sucks. Excuse me for a minute Sophie," Clem apologized. "I've got to go talk to Spike about this because I'll bet any money he's the culprit."  
  
Sophie went into the dining room where Xander, Willow and Anya were sitting. Anya had seemed a little distant when she first got here but she kindly offered up her seat for Sophie to sit in when she approached the table.  
  
"What a thoughtful person," Sophie thought.  
  
Anya promptly sat down in Xander's lap. Sophie didn't quite understand why she would do this when there was another chair at the table but perhaps that chair was broken.  
  
"Clem's out of beer," Sophie explained. "Is there a beer store near here that we could walk to?"  
  
"There's a beer store over on the other side of town," Xander offered. "But it's pretty far to go." Turning to Anya he added, "However, I could go for some cool, frosty refreshment as I'm feeling a bit warmed up all of a sudden."  
  
The couple cuddled and giggled at some kind of inside joke. Willow was sitting next to Sophie and she just sighed as though this were a common occurrence.  
  
Xander and Anya got even more nauseatingly cute as they play argued about who would go and get beer. Finally Willow seemed to have enough of it and offered to go.  
  
"What a nice surprise that would be for Clem," Sophie thought and agreed to go with her.  
  
Willow must have been very tired as instead of getting up to go she put her head down on the table.  
  
"Ok," Willow said to herself out loud. "This is me going to the beer store." Nothing. "Ok, I'm getting up now and going to go to the beer store." Nothing again. "Why is nothing happening?" she asked.  
  
"I'm not going to watch Willow have a discussion with herself. That's just boring. How about some amusing board games?" Anya suggested with far more excitement than the proposal merited.  
  
"I think I'll pass," Sophie declined. "I'll wait til Willow is ready to go to the beer store and then I'll keep her company. She shouldn't go out alone at night."  
  
Willow just remained with her head down on the table.  
  
"Well, I'm going to see who's up for a little poker," Xander stood up.  
  
Anya turned and gave him a funny look. "No," he explained to her quickly. "Not that kind, definitely not that kind."  
  
* * *  
  
"I'll tell you what," Spike offered. "If you help me put the squeeze on the kiddies here I'll not only replace your six pack but I'll get Sophie's phone number for you."  
  
Clem was taken aback by the vampire's boldness. "Uh, you noticed that I like her?" Clem stammered.  
  
"I notice everything that goes on around me," Spike bragged. "You can't have lived as long as I have without knowing a thing or two about human or demon nature for that matter. So what do you say? Do we fleece the sheep?"  
  
Clem looked towards the others before nodding, "Ok Spike. I'm up for it. But I don't have any kittens with me and you never do. How are we supposed to play?"  
  
"Kittens," Tara piped up walking over to join them. "What's this about kittens?"  
  
"We're going to play poker," Clem explained.  
  
"So what does that have to do with kittens?" she asked confused.  
  
Buffy rushed over to interrupt the discussion. "No kittens. There will be no playing with kittens in this house," she overruled.  
  
Clem shook his head in disgust. "What was it with her? How can you have a good game of poker without any kittens?" he thought to himself. "Well, I guess we'll just have to use money," he conceded.  
  
"I'm a little pressed for cash just now," Spike announced as he sat down. "Who'll stake me?"  
  
Almost everyone in the room put their hand up. Spike sighed in disgust, "I guess things haven't changed as much as I thought they had." He turned and looked at Buffy who was obviously caught between enjoying the same joke she had made on him just months ago and embarrassment on his behalf.  
  
"Don't pretend you didn't enjoy that little joke at Spike's expense," he directed towards her. "You'll get yours later birthday girl."  
  
"I'll look forward to it," Buffy teased laughing.  
  
"I'll spot you Spike," Clem offered. "We can play as partners." Clem was trying very hard not to give away their prior conversation and tip anyone off as to their plans.  
  
"Hey, that sounds like a good idea," Spike agreed. "Let's do that then."  
  
Xander and Tara joined them at the table to escape Anya who had brought out a selection of inane board games to amuse the group including everything from Operation to My Little Pony. Being the birthday girl, Buffy made the wise choice of Monopoly as she and her sister sat down to play joined by Anya and Richard. Needless to say, hilarity did not ensue as Anya was intent on winning, she was probably even cheating. Not that Clem could fault her. He just hoped that the fact that he had settled for playing cards for *money* didn't get back to any of his poker regulars.  
  
* * *  
  
  
  
"Willow, wake up," Sophie urged. "We were going to go to the beer store."  
  
"What time is it? "Willow asked groggily.  
  
"It's about midnight," Sophie said checking her watch. "I don't even know if the beer store is open anymore."  
  
"Well if it's not open then we don't have to go anywhere," Willow realized. "I kind of like it here. I don't really want to leave."  
  
Sophie nodded in agreement. Her mother would be wondering why she was staying out so late but for once Sophie didn't seem to care about that. She just wanted to stay at Buffy's house.  
  
"Let's go sit with the others," she suggested. "I'm feeling kind of lonely in here all by ourselves."  
  
"I can do that," Willow decided. "Let's go in the living room. I don't really feel like playing board games with Anya but we can join the gang and cheer them on. I hope Buffy kicks Anya's butt." Willow caught herself quickly, "But in a non-violent game playing kind of way. Not for real. Definitely no to butt kicking because Buffy doesn't do that sort of thing. She's a very non-violent kind of person. But I'm sure you've noticed that working with her at the Doublemeat."  
  
Sophie just stared at Willow.  
  
Willow seemed uncomfortable all of a sudden. "Why don't we just head into the other room."  
  
Upon reaching the sofa Willow collapsed at one end and promptly fell asleep. Sophie settled onto the sofa just behind Buffy. From her vantage point she could see the back of Clem's head as he enjoyed a game of poker. He seemed to perk up when she entered the room as though he could sense her presence. Slowly she drifted off to sleep as well. For some reason she had a strange dream about kittens running all over the place and her Sharpi Petey was chasing them.  
  
The sound of good hearted laughter woke Sophie and as she opened her eyes she beheld once again the back of Clem's head as he sat on the floor watching the morning cartoons with Dawn and Xander. The realization that she had stayed out all night jolted her into alertness. Her mother would not be impressed.  
  
Suddenly Buffy and Spike came storming into the room.  
  
"There's something strange going on. Everyone wake up and come here," Buffy called out.  
  
Clem stood up and took a seat near them. Sophie walked over and sat in the seat next to him and turned to shyly look at him. Tara and Willow came running from the kitchen as the others gathered around.  
  
"What is it Buffy," Willow asked breathlessly.  
  
Buffy quickly explained how they weren't able to leave the house. Something or someone was keeping them there. Sophie balked at the idea but had to accept it as fact when she saw evidence to support it.  
  
"How can this be, Buffy? she asked. "I'm sorry but I don't understand how this can be happening." Sophie was starting to get nervous.  
  
"Don't be afraid," Clem comforted her. "There's lots of things in this world we can't explain or begin to understand why it happens, it just does."  
  
Surprisingly those few words made Sophie felt much better. Clem put his hand on hers and everything else melted away for the two. Sophie didn't even mind not being able to leave for her shift at the Doublemeat Palace. For the first time in her life she felt free. Free of her stupid job, free of her mother, free of this awful life she had thought she was stuck in. How ironic that being *trapped* could make her feel so free. Sophie knew the others were trying to come up with ideas and solutions to the problem but all she was aware of was the gentle pressure of Clem's hand on hers. His hands were much softer than they looked. Sophie slowly entwined her fingers with his, accepting the comfort he offered and welcoming his touch.  
  
Tara got up and went into the kitchen while Willow disappeared upstairs. The others just sat there and waited.  
  
Sophie, Clem and Richard moved into the dining room together, the three outsiders to the party. Sophie was glad this wasn't a Star Trek episode or else one of three would be doomed to die. She paled at the thought of anything happening to Clem. As Buffy's friends gathered at the front door they came over to watch and see what would happen.  
  
It felt like hours but was probably only 20 minutes before Tara called out from the kitchen, "Try the front door."  
  
Spike attempted to reach for the door. Nothing. Still nothing.  
  
Sophie motioned to Clem to follow her as she headed towards the living room. If they were going to be stuck here forever at least they could be comfortable. All of a sudden a large red blur came at them. Everything was happening so fast that Sophie didn't even get a chance to see what it was before Clem shoved her back into the dining room to safety. Buffy leapt past her to take on this menace who promptly disappeared after wounding Richard.  
  
Once order was restored Sophie quickly looked around for Clem and happily found him unharmed. She let out a sigh of relief. The danger was over. Buffy and the others were going to find a way for them all to get out of the house and Sophie knew it wouldn't be much longer.  
  
Xander helped Richard get upstairs and laid him down on Willow's bed where he gave in to unconsciousness. Tara started to lift his shirt to get a closer look at the wound when Buffy quickly leapt forward and pulled her hand away.  
  
"Stop," she cried out. "Don't expose the wound to the light. That's a special blade and it's been dipped in a mystical potion. If light gets at the cut for more than a few minutes it will become poisonous and he will die. We have to treat the wound through the cloth, that's the only thing that will protect him."  
  
Sophie agreed to sit with Richard while the others tried to figure out what to do. It seems that Tara was involved in some kind of witchcraft that they thought might help. Perhaps she knew of some other kind of spell that might work. After the others had gone downstairs Clem snuck in to sit with her.  
  
"How are you doing?" he asked with a concerned look on his face.  
  
Sophie's calm broke. "I don't understand what's going on," she sobbed. "Why can't we leave this house and what was that thing that attacked us? I'm so frightened."  
  
Clem put reassuring arms around her and pulled Sophie close to his chest. "Don't worry, it will all turn out alright."  
  
"My mother," Sophie choked on her words.  
  
"Will she be worried?" Clem asked tenderly.  
  
Sophie looked up into his eyes. "Not so much worried as angry for not knowing where I am. She doesn't care about what happens to me so much as she cares about being in charge of me. She can't control this and I'm sure it's driving her crazy. She doesn't even know where Buffy lives or her last name. I'm sure she's on the phone with the Doublemeat Palace trying to find out by now."  
  
Clem's look of concern turned to one of alarm, "Are things really that bad Sophie?" He tightened his hold on her.  
  
"I've never been able to do anything on my own," Sophie confessed for the first time to anyone. "I've never had any friends because my mother never approved. She's put a stranglehold on my entire life and I've let her. I don't get a say in anything. I never get what *I* want."  
  
"What do you want?" Clem questioned.  
  
Sophie leaned in and kissed Clem deeply tears welling up in her eyes. He was her first kiss and his warmth and caring overwhelmed her. She felt his hand on her back tapping at her gently at first then more urgently. She broke away from his soft lips to sigh into his ear, "Oh Clem." Clem pulled away from her and held her cheeks with both his hands as if to memorize her face.  
  
"I never thought I would be saying this but you are the most beautiful creature I have ever seen in my life," Clem pulled her into another kiss while keeping his hands on both sides of her face as though afraid to let her go. The tapping on Sophie's back resumed and she broke away from Clem suddenly startled in the realization that it wasn't him.  
  
"Um, excuse me," came the confused voice of Richard from behind her. "What's going on?"  
  
Sophie spun around to meet the eyes of the newly conscious Richard. "You're awake," she announced. "Let me get Buffy, she'll know what to do."  
  
Sophie took off down the stairs to find her friend. Clem remained behind with Richard. He couldn't help but grin from ear to ear.  
  
"So what are you anyway?" Richard asked. "I know you're not human."  
  
"I'm a Lythaar demon," Clem explained.  
  
"A what?" Richard cried out in surprise.  
  
"Oh, come on, you can't tell me you're surprised," Clem chortled. "I hear you're a Benzax demon yourself. Bad luck about the anal genitals but I hear your breed has other good qualities. You don't look like you've started developing the male mammaries yet so that's something."  
  
Richard started to sit up in bed a bit. "What are you talking about?" he spurted. "I'm no demon. I'm a human, just like everyone else here, except obviously you." Richard clutched his side from the exertion.  
  
Realization washed over Clem like a sickness. He felt like he might be ill. Spike had lied to him yet again and now here he was stuck in this house with these *people*. The humility of it all. He had to get away from them but he was trapped in this house. No escape.  
  
Buffy raced in past Clem with Tara by her side. "Richard?" she hovered over the wounded man. "Can you hear me?"  
  
Richard opened his eyes and gave her a brave smile. "Is it bad?" He asked worriedly.  
  
Buffy put on a brave face. "It's not so bad," she lied. "You just have to lie still. We'll get you out of here very soon so you can go to the hospital. Trust me, I'll get everyone out of here."  
  
* * *  
  
Clem was furious. He stormed downstairs in search of Spike and dragged him into the kitchen away from the others. "You lied to me," Clem angrily shoved Spike against the wall. "These aren't demons. They're people. Filthy, disgusting people. How could you do this to me? What could possibly prompt you to subject me to this?"  
  
Spike turned serious then came clean with the demon who held him in a death grip. "Love."  
  
"What are you talking about?" Clem wasn't buying it. This was just another of Spike's lies. "You're in love? With who?" he demanded.  
  
"Buffy," the blond vampire admitted grudgingly. "I'm utterly in love with her and I couldn't bear not to be here but I couldn't let her get the upper hand in it. If I had you come with me then I didn't seem so desperate to see her."  
  
Clem just shook his head in disgust. "You're not only in love with a human, but the Slayer at that. How can you look at yourself in the mirror?"  
  
"That really hasn't been too much of a problem," Spike pointed out. "Honestly though, I wish I weren't in love with her but it's bigger than the both of us."  
  
Talk of love made more recent events spring to Clem's mind. "So what about Sophie?" Clem wanted to know. "Is she a…a…..I can't bring myself to say it."  
  
"Yeah, she's human," Spike acknowledged. "I just thought that if you knew that you wouldn't want to stay and I'd be stuck here by myself looking pathetic."  
  
"Spike," Clem said, the hurt apparent in his voice. "You've been chasing Buffy around all night and she hasn't paid you any attention at all. You would have been pathetic whether I was here or not." With those final words Clem stormed off.  
  
* * *  
  
Sophie overheard Spike and Clem arguing in the kitchen. She was worried that she might have done something wrong that had offended Clem. When he came out she started towards him but he just glared at her and stormed upstairs.  
  
"What have I done wrong?" Sophie asked herself. She tried to follow him upstairs but he had locked himself in one of the rooms.  
  
"Just leave me alone," he demanded when she tapped gently at the door.  
  
"It's Sophie," she entreated. "Please tell me what's wrong?"  
  
"I don't want to talk to anyone," he thundered. "Especially you."  
  
Feeling like she had just had her heart ripped out Sophie began to sob quietly and then turned and began her slow march down the stairs away from Clem. She turned into the dining room, which was vacant. She didn't want anyone to see her crying. She stood and stared outside the window at the world she knew had no place for her. "Oh god, oh god," she repeated to herself. Silently she realized that her mother must have been right all along. There was no escape from this dreaded life. In the corner of her eye she saw Buffy start to mount the stairs.  
  
* * *  
  
"Why did she have to be so beautiful, so sweet," Clem thought to himself kicking the edge of someone's bed. He didn't know humans could be like that. Sophie was special. Maybe it was the fact that she was human that made her so. Clem needed to talk to her and sort this out. He unlocked the door and stepped out into the hallway almost colliding with Buffy.  
  
"Sorry," he excused himself and continued down the hallway.  
  
"Clem," Buffy called him back. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" Buffy invited him into her bedroom and closed the door behind her. "I'm sorry for how I treated you earlier. I'm afraid I haven't been a very good host. This whole trapped in the house thing has kind of thrown me for a loop."  
  
Clem stared at her in amazement. Was this the infamous Slayer apologizing to him for her bad manners? Clem had been half in fear all night that she would kill him and now this?  
  
"It's more than that isn't it Buffy?" Clem observed. "It's Spike too."  
  
Buffy nodded her head in agreement. "I thought you probably knew about us. Huh?"  
  
"Not 'til tonight. I figured it out when I saw you together. It's hard to miss. Spike didn't have to say it in so many words but when you've played poker together as much as we have you get to be able to read someone. He's got it bad for you." Clem pointed out.  
  
"It's so difficult being around him like this, with all my friends here. You won't say anything will you?" Buffy asked earnestly.  
  
"Your secret is safe with me," Clem promised. "But don't you see that you're not just lying to your friends Buffy, you're lying to yourself by not admitting how you feel about him and you're hurting Spike in the process. He's very vulnerable right now. I think you'd do him less damage if you drove a stake through his heart rather than play him in this way. I think you should decide what you want and let the chips fall where they may."  
  
"You had to use a poker metaphor didn't you?" Buffy recognized with a little discomfort at the truth in his words. "At least we didn't have any kittens here tonight."  
  
"That's too bad," Clem observed. "I was getting a bit peckish."  
  
Buffy shook her head in disgust. "Yech, that's just perverted."  
  
"And you and Spike aren't? Clem demanded. "But at least I'm up front about what I like. I don't pretend about kittens and I'm not going to pretend about anything else." Clem thought back to how hurt Sophie had been when he rejected her. "I know what I am and I know what I have to do. What about you?"  
  
Buffy stared back at him. "You're lucky then because that's something I still have to figure out. I guess I have some thinking to do. Thanks for talking to me Clem. I appreciate it." Buffy squeezed his arm affectionately.  
  
"You're welcome," Clem smiled. "Happy birthday."  
  
"It's not my birthday anymore," Buffy pointed out. "Oh and I wanted to tell you that I've seen you and Sophie getting along really well and I think that's great. She's a super person and you seem to be a pretty nice guy too. I hope you two will be happy together."  
  
Clem stared at her in amazement. Maybe he had been wrong about her too.  
  
* * *  
  
As Clem descended the stairs he heard Sophie's low sobs. If she could forgive him for how he had acted he would do everything he could to make it up to her. She sat in a chair in the living room all alone while the others were in the dining room. They seemed to be mad at Willow for some reason but Clem had bigger worries on his mind as he set out intent on making amends. "Sophie," he said gently. "I'm so sorry for how I acted. You didn't deserve that. You deserve better than me."  
  
Sophie looked up, the tears still fresh on her cheeks. "Why did you act that way? What did I do?" she asked.  
  
"It wasn't you. It was me" Clem explained. "Sometimes I'm so pigheaded I do foolish things but I'm so sorry. I don't want us to argue. I want to forget that ever happened. Can we please start again?"  
  
Sophie nodded her assent. Hearing a noise from the other room Sophie turned to see Anya dash up the stairs in a rage. How she could fall in love in such a mad house as this she didn't know. Sophie wrapped her arms around Clem and held him tight at the thought of it. Clem responded, melting into her arms. Suddenly loud banging and shouting emerged from upstairs. Dawn came flying down the staircase with Anya in hot pursuit. Sophie turned to look at Clem uncomfortably as the two females engaged in a very personal argument. Feeling like spectators at a tragic comedy Sophie and Clem watched on amazed as Anya proceeded to summon a vengeance demon who it turned out was responsible for their current state of captivity. Willow came over and sat down with them not sure what to say or do to halt the debacle. Adding to the madness the demon who attacked them earlier returned and all hell broke loose. Clem, Sophie and Willow dove behind the chair and crouched down low out of harm's way.  
  
"Stay low," Willow cautioned. "Buffy will take care of this." Fulfilling that pronouncement Buffy leapt forward and succeeded in capturing the demon in her sword which she promptly destroyed thus killing the demon.  
  
Clem felt a little bit bad for the demon but acknowledged that Sophie's safety had been compromised so it was all for the best. He put his hand up on her shoulder reassuringly to tell her that the worst was over. Sophie smiled back and everything was alright in the world.  
  
After some discussion, the vengeance demon pronounced the curse lifted. Clem clapped his hands in delight and turned to give a big smile to Sophie. At last they were free.  
  
"But what do I do now?" Sophie wondered to herself. While trapped inside the house she had felt safe and protected. Suddenly she felt completely open to new experiences and she was overwhelmed by the thought of it. It was like being born again into a new life. A new life with Clem in it.  
  
As Spike opened the door the group made their way out into the world in awe of what wonders it held. It was like seeing everything with new eyes.  
  
Clem was filled with a sense of excitement of where things would go. Things had worked out with Sophie, he would never make the mistake of undervaluing her worth again. She had come to mean so much to him in such a short time and he planned to prove it to her. He turned to face Buffy who had not ventured out into the world. He gave her a knowing smile and a thumbs up, all former distrust forgotten. "Good party," he congratulated her before turning to take on the rest of his life. The world was a beautiful thing because Sophie was in it. Sophie stood at the foot of the walk waiting for him. "I just wanna," he caught himself up short, overwhelmed by the beauty of the night. "The earth and the grass," he exorted. "I can feel the dew drops between my…." Clem stared deeply into Sophie's eyes. "God look at the stars," and with those words he kissed her.  
  
* * *  
  
Epilogue:  
  
The next night at the Doublemeat Palace Buffy was anxious to speak with Sophie to find out how she had made out when she got home.  
  
"My mother was pretty upset," Sophie admitted. "But I stood my ground and told her that since I was twenty years old I can do what I like. If she doesn't like it that's just too bad."  
  
Buffy was impressed by the strength of this formerly timid girl. "What about Clem?" she asked smiling.  
  
"I've never known anyone like him," Sophie sighed. "Have you ever been with someone who you know you probably shouldn't be with but everything with them is so right that the whole world falls away when you're together?"  
  
"I can imagine what that would be like," Buffy reflecting on her own situation.  
  
"Now that I know him I can't imagine us not being together," Sophie went on dreamily. "It's like he's always been a part of my life."  
  
Buffy nodded in agreement somewhat distracted by other thoughts.  
  
"Besides," Sophie went on. "Being around Clem just makes me feel fantastic. My skin even twitches when I'm around him. Just like it does under the fluorescent lights here at work."  
  
Buffy turned to Sophie with a startled expression on her face.  
  
The end. 


End file.
